Mommy Used to Work For Nine West…It’s In My Blood

April 02, 2014

It always starts out with a Little Pirate Disappearing Act. On bad days it results in a butcher knife in her little fist as she runs out of the kitchen, where she sprung it free from the dishwasher. On better days it usually results in something like this: Someone got into Mom’s closet again. Ready […]

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Investors and the DC Real Estate Market

March 14, 2014

Also published on the Huffington Post “I wanted to find an investment property that I could fix up and rent out. Can you help me with that?” There it is — my least favorite call. Everyone and their mother are chasing investment properties in D.C. because they finally got the memo from 2010 that D.C. […]

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Time’s Up! Except It’s Not, Because Everyone’s a Winner!

March 03, 2014

The late-season snow today resulted in an unexpected day of quiet at home with the Pirate. Cool Dad ditched me for the internet cafe so he could get some work done. Apparently he doesn’t enjoy talking to clients on the phone while a 2 & 1/2 foot terror climbs up his leg screaming and crying […]

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New Year, New Real Estate Market for DC

February 10, 2014

Also published on the Huffington Post The pace of the DC Real Estate market continued right through the fall with a fury. The pace of the market actually continued right through the holidays with a fury. It was shocking to see houses listed on Christmas Eve and under contract by New Year’s, but then, this […]

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Mompetition

January 22, 2014

There’s a message forum in DC for parents that is a hilarious source of entertainment. Sometimes there is some decent information on there, but it’s mostly a bunch of crazy people who spout all sorts of things that indicate just how misinformed they really are…at life. I actually made a New Year’s Resolution to stay […]

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Christmas at Disney

January 01, 2014

It was somewhat of a last minute decision but the incessant sub-freezing temps inspired me to try to plan a last minute trip to Florida for Christmas. Cool Dad was not on board with this idea, but when he realized I was serious as we shivered one night because the heat just wasn’t cutting it […]

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Destruction and Inappropriateness With Toddlers

December 16, 2013

I was heading out the other morning and noticed this as I exited the front door of the condo: I made a mental note to let the building manager know our Exit Sign was falling off the ceiling, and then had a thought. I walked backward, in the same steps I made leaving the condo, […]

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21st Century Cartoons Suck

December 11, 2013

Well, my life is over. Caillou that little fucker has a Holiday Movie. And the Pirate has started handing us the remote and saying “Caillou!” This isn’t good. If you don’t know, Caillou is the most annoying piece of shit excuse for a cartoon that you’ve ever seen. I used to equally hate Caillou and […]

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Stupid Things Your Real Estate Agent Might Be Doing

November 21, 2013

Also published on the Huffington Post I get it. Agents get a bad rap. I can’t help but get my feelings hurt a little when I hear things like we’re idiots, or money-hungry, but then I’m out there pounding the pavement and come face to face with an agent whose ability to sustain his or […]

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Buh-Bye Elmo!

Never underestimate the power of Facebook to assist you in parenting. Sort of like how TV was in the 70’s, except this is interactive. One of my friends wisely suggested we try to call the “I Stole Your Money, Ha HAAAAAAA Elmo” makers. I found their number and gave them a call. BadMommy: We just […]

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