Quick! Fill in the blank! There is nothing sexier than waking up to _________ Okay okay, now me! There is nothing sexier than waking up to the sound of your dog vomiting. If you have a dog you know that sound. It’s similar to the human dry-heave, except it’s a wet heave. You can actually […]
Read MoreLet’s Play – “There’s Nothing Sexier Than…”
March 18, 2019
Welcome to the Jungle
March 04, 2019When people say “You should get out more” I’m pretty sure they aren’t talking to me. Because every time I go out, something stupid happens. Both days this weekend I woke up “early” and was surprised to leave behind a house of sleeping kids, dogs and husband, only to learn that the rest of the […]
Read MoreDCPS Lottery ~ All Cleared Up For You!
February 06, 2019Whenever there’s a question about DC Public Schools and their “clear as mud” lottery system, several people in my brokerage like to point to me. I mean, they point to me for a lot of stuff like “Who stole my space heater?” (sorry Lisa) “Who has the white out?” (I have a paper planner and […]
Read MoreAnd I Didn’t Puke This Time!
January 30, 2019Guess who went on another field trip as a chaperone? Yes, this glutton for punishment. As someone who gets car sick backing out of the driveway, you would think I would stop raising my hand for this stuff. Here’s the good news: I can finally say I’ve been to and toured Dumbarton House! Here’s the […]
Read MoreA Tale of Three Emails
January 26, 2019It was the best of days, it was the worst of days, it was the Realtor® of wisdom, it was the Realtor® of foolishness, it was the new mom of belief, it was the new mom of incredulity, It was the Amish in light, it was the Amish in darkness, it was a corgi rescue […]
Read MoreShe Was Caught in a Mudslide, Eaten By a Lion, Got Run Over by a Crappy Purple Scion
January 19, 2019It’s no secret we’re in love with Summer Nanny. She came back last year to be Spring Nanny, and Summer Nanny again for 2018, and Fall Nanny and now she’s Winter Nanny. It seems though, Winter Nanny was offered a job which will make use of her MBA and her days with us are sadly […]
Read MoreYou Are Feeling Verrrrry Sleepy
January 05, 2019If you know me personally, you know that I’ve been struggling to drop the 25 lbs that magically appeared after Chubs was born. I look in the mirror and don’t recognize myself. I see pictures of myself from when I “thought” I was fat, and I’m like, “Girllll give me that body back any day.” […]
Read MoreWhen Santa Squeezes His Fat White Ass Down That Chimney Tonight, He’s Gonna Find the Jolliest Bunch of A-Holes This Side of the Nuthouse
December 24, 2018Growing up, the holidays truly never disappointed in the Terzis household. Before visions of Norman Rockwell dance in your head, let me clarify: We’re really talking more Griswalds. Someone kept screaming “Save yourself!” It was me, and too bad I never listened. This year we’re heading to Connecticut the day after Christmas. The trip happens […]
Read MoreThat Beeyotch Manning the Toys for Tots Table
December 16, 2018The Glover Park Holiday Party was this past Friday night. The party is just as much a neighborhood event as it is a school event. Because I like to be all helpful and shizz, I checked out the list of volunteer spots available to see what help was needed. You gotta know your limits when […]
Read MoreBananas Never Survive a Roadtrip
December 08, 2018Today is Real Estate Dad’s birthday. I thought about not saying anything until 10 minutes to midnight like he did to me last year, but I decided not to. I mean, I don’t want anyone to think I hold a grudge or anything. Besides, he looked so good when he got ready for a meeting […]
Read MoreC'est Moi
I am Melissa ~ Washington DC Realtor®, Snarky Commentator, Mama to two maniacs, Rescuer of Corgis and wife of a really laid back man.
How to Find Me
Licensed DC/MD/VA
Cell: (202) 253-9105
Melissa@MelissaTerzis.com
RLAH Real Estate
11 Dupont Circle NW #650
Washington, DC 20036
(202) 518-8781
