Thankful for Chubs Hilarious Mouth

Three days into a five day Thanksgiving vacation over here. We’re constantly breaking new records in this house. For example, the girls have gone from love to hate to love to hate about 453 times in the last 72 hours.

I started a list of Chubs-one-liners because some hilarious stuff has been coming out of her mouth. Like how she asked me to cut the nail on her foot-thumb. Or when Princess Roundhead was crying because she missed Summer Nanny and Chubs said, “You’re so annoying, she’s just a nanny.” I asked Princess Roundhead if I could hold her that day and Chubs flew across the room into my lap and said, “You can snuggle with her feet, Mama is holding me right now.”

On Thanksgiving, she asked how Yiayia was going to get up the stairs to our house. I said, “Daddy and Uncle Jimmy are going to carry her.” She believed me so she ran to the door when they arrived, hoping to see the show.

She said, “I don’t want Yiayia to give me a kiss. Her kisses are prickly.”

I said, “We’re Greek honey, we get beards.”

“Will I have one too?”

As I sadly nodded my head she went to the mirror to check it out. I hate to crush her little spirit but it’s really better if she’s prepared.

Yesterday we went to a playground in Dupont – my old single-girl stomping grounds. I know, back when I was single, Dupont wasn’t much of a stomping-ground for straight-women, but I like to think I made the most of it. As soon as we arrived, Princess Roundhead announced she had to use the bathroom. Never fails.

Fortunately I had bumped into a couple people who still lived there and one offered to let us use his bathroom. Off we went to take care of business, then back to the playground.

Several hours later, at home and settled in for the night and my guard totally down, Chubs struck like a snake in the grass.

“Mama, why did you kiss Scott?”

My jaw hits the floor. I’m wondering how far under this bus my wing-woman is going to throw me.

Real Estate Dad said, “Who is Scott?”

Chubs says, “Mama kissed him on the lips.”

Real Estate Dad said, “Who is Scott?”

I’m looking at Chubs like, “Really, Chubs, really?”

One quick “You remember Scott…building next door…gay…” later and I was off any portion of the hook on which I was dangling.

110% Devil

110% Devil